Wednesday, August 5, 2015

LOVE - As they call it.

Dear Diary,
I haven’t been in touch with you for a really long time. And I am quite unsure if I still am capable enough to be able to put down my thoughts into words. Yet, I am here to try.

I’ll be lying if I say that my words lack a motive, or I am writing just to make sure I can still do that. Frankly, a lot of incidents have significantly impacted my ideas about life and love to be particular. When I last wrote to you I was 19. And now as I talk to you about it, I am 22. In all these 3 years I was hoping that I’d be surer of people around me. My thoughts would crystallize into something more concrete. And that’s the funny bit. I have never been so unsure about anything.

Love and Life: Amusingly, the two L’s that screw you to bits. Ever felt how everything would be so unchallenging had these two categorically significant terms had no meaning at all? A question that intrigues me is how easily a human learns to love and live, or Live and love. The very act of loving as you live is so inherent and natural to the human psyche that as you grow old, this concept gets deeply embedded in your being. A life without love looks so alien. It is this myth of naturalness that possibly amazes me.

Let me put it in clearer terms. How is it convenient for someone to Love the other so deeply when nobody taught you to do so? And I am not talking about plain love. I here mean to mention the “I-cannot-live-without-you” kind of crazy love. And fortunately enough, as I question this, the answer becomes more clear and evident

It is hard for us humans to imagine ourselves without love. If we go back and date how human minds have evolved we realize how life forms began to emerge to make love possible. All of this cant be one simple co-incidence? The naturalness of feelings, the evolving life forms, the inherency of concepts pertaining to giving and sharing – all this has a motive. And it is this motive that I need to understand.

I am in great awe of the people who tell me that they don’t understand love or they don’t have the bone to love.  You don’t need to acquire this, you just have it. The simple joys of life come from the warmth and the intimacy you share with the person/thing that you are the closest to. It just comes. You don’t look for it. You don’t try and force your way through it. It Just Comes. That’s the beauty of this sentiment.

As I google the term, Wikipedia tells me that love is "the unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another". Now this is another cause of concern. Is love really unselfish? Can you love someone or something without looking for a motive in it? What do you then call the act of “expecting” the reciprocation as? Is that not what you call a selfish gain out of something so unselfish and benevolent?

Here, comes the question of categorization of love. Love is a hierarchy – from the lowest rung to the highest. All have their own forms and way of love. There are many layers and innumerable planes of this single emotion. As Osho says, at the lowest level, love is a kind of politics. It is a dominating tendency that exists between a husband a wife, and a girlfriend and a boyfriend. The whole thing is political. You want to dominate the other, you enjoy this domination.
It is only when you move upwards in the order you realize that how this feeling matures out of this politics to the state of being unconditionally available. And that I feel is the purest form of this unsure state.

Some realize it too soon, and some take forever to know that it is this unconditional love that defines this word. Every attachment is not love. Every intimacy is not love. Every bond is not love. Love is simple. It is kind. It is forgiving. It is unchallenging. It is pure.
It is selfless. It is passionate. It isn’t bound by expectations, but by chains of affection.

Diary, I am deeply satisfied how after hours of rumbling discontent with my inner self, I am able to express so easily to you. You are my love maybe. I give without expecting and you take without demanding.

Nivruti.