Monday, October 17, 2011

A diary page found amidst nothings.

..."She came, she saw, she tried and .." 25th november

For her.. the world looked perfect from her rose tinted spectacles. PERFECT. Imperfection, a term that never existed. Welcoming every morning with a smile, watching the pouring rain, enjoying the falling drops, noticing a puppy play. Yes, these little things. For her they weren't little.. they meant something. They had a meaning for her. A day without tummy aching laugh's was a day wasted. A day without the curling the ends of her lips had no meaning. Feeling the warmth of the sun, adoring the winds that brushed past her, gazing at the starry sky and peeping into the moonlight. Everything seemed so beautiful.

Yet, the world wasn't what she thought it to be. It was UGLY. It was rude. Everytime she gathered some courage to start things afresh, the ugly remains of past came gushing back. "No. They wont affect her", she thought. "This time, they wont. It'd be different this time. Very different from the past". Tripping over the stones, she managed to get up, dust off her clothes and act like nothing happened.

Walking through the new paths, she started off to look ahead. The same sun, the same adorable moon, the same amazing breeze and the same puppies rolling in the mud. It was a start of the "perfect" journey. The very thought of that little something filled her with extreme joy. She would smile to herself, not knowing the people around her are mocking at her. Adoring herself NOW was a new addition to her list of beautiful things.

Sadly, my friend,
This life is unfair. If it gives you one, it detaches you from two.

she fell. Yet again ..

But this time, she gave up. Drained of all the courage she had.. she gave up.

Not knowing what more the future has in store for her, She gave up.

Life, for her, had a new meaning now , a very different one this time.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Chromosome XX

Dear world,

It’s dark here. I can’t hear much. Just a dull vibe of the ultrasound, maybe. The fluids about me dance as the machine inspects my form. This moment is dense. I can feel her heartbeat, now, louder than ever. I can feel her pain, now, more than ever. I wish I had a voice to scream. I wish they had ears to hear. I wish all of us could feel.

But it doesn’t matter what I feel. To the world, I am yet, unborn. I am yet, not “alive”. I am just flesh and blood and bones, with life…and with a gender. After today, after the machine speaks its truth, I may never see the world. I might be severed from her and from the nourishment I need. I might be severed from the protection of her body. I might “die”. But as no one yet considers me alive, no one will mourn my death.

Even if I am brought out into the world, for fear of law, society or just someone’s conscience, my fate will not be much different. I will be deprived of food for satisfying a brother’s appetite. I will be deprived of an education to further suppress my being. I will be dominated over and my own defences will be shattered as others invade me. My body, my soul. My voice will be muffled so that a calcified voice can be heard. My strength will be termed a weakness and my wishes left unfulfilled. I will be made to work, without ever being acknowledged. I will be made to cry, without being heard. I will be sold, without receiving a price. I will be ostracized, if I ever dare to live my own life.
I will try and fail to show the world, that “he” is but a part of “her”. He cannot exist without her.

And now, it is growing darker. I feel strangled. I feel suffocated. I see my small world, in a bag, drain away before me. I know this is too soon. I know I can’t survive in this world so soon. I am not ready yet. But no one cares. In fact, this is exactly what they wish. They wish to kill me. They wish to have only a son.
It’s coming to an end now, and before me, I see the future. A future, in a world without me. Where only sons exist. Where they cannot find me to torture, to invade. So they are driven to but each other. To vent their frustrations, which they were so used to inflicting on me. There are only the last few of us remaining, and they live a life which doesn’t fit into the definition of the word. Mere objects, being passed on from one son to another. They choose to end their life. And now it’s only him. Only he reigns supreme in the world…alone.
And now there is a stagnating human world. They slowly die out. Without me, they are unable to have a ‘son’. And the world comes to an end because there isn’t any daughter.

As the darkness grows deep, as I suffocate more, I wish to die this death than to live in the man’s world. I choose to leave before I could enter. Because if they cannot give me a life, they do not deserve me.
I refuse to live in this “Man’s world”.

- Chromosome XX

Thursday, October 6, 2011

You know you grew up in India in the 90's

Read this somewhere.. and found THIS to be the perfect place to put it up! :)

You Know You Grew Up in India in the 90s When…
1) You know the words to ‘In-pin-safety-pin’ and ‘akkad-bakkad’ by heart
2) Cricket is almost a religion for you, and you idolize at least one of Rahul Dravid/Sachin Tendulkar/Saurav Ganguly
3) You have read at least some Chacha Chaudhary or Tinkle comics
4) You’ve watched Shaktimaan on TV at least once in your life. And you can immediately recognize the character when you see him.
5) You have some ‘NRI’ relatives.
6) You couldn’t wait for it to be December so you could have the Toblerone chocolates your NRI relatives brought you
7) You watched Cartoon Network, and then the late night movies on TNT that came after Cartoon Network ended.
8) You watched corny dubbed versions of Small Wonder, Silver Spoon, and I Dream of Jeanie
9) You were THRILLED when McDonald’s opened in your neighborhood (or even eight kilometers away)
10) A visit to Pizza Hut used to mean a special treat
11) You have seen Kuch Kuch Hota Hai and Hum Aapke Hain Kaun at least 5 times each
12) You still remember the theme song of Hum Paanch. (Hum Paanch, Pam Pam Pam Paanch!)
13) You have played hours upon hour of running and catching, chor-police, lagori, saankli, ‘Doctor, doctor, help us!’, ‘Lock and key’
14) You have seen girls play ‘Amina Super Sina’ more times than you can remember. (And you still don’t know what it means!)
15) Dog ‘in’ the bone was your favorite co-ed game.
16) Much of your free time in school was spent playing UNO.
17) You collected trump cards of wrestlers, cricketers, and airplanes, and did not quite understand why your younger siblings were obsessed with Pokemon and the other Japanese trends that followed.
18) Your summer vacations were often synonymous with visiting your grandparents or cousins
19) Your parents, at some point, told you ‘Dark Room’ was a bad game to play. But you still loved playing it.
20) Bole mere lips, I love uncle Chips!
21) You know the song ‘Made in India’ by Alisha Chinai
22) You have seen many many many episodes of ‘Antakshari’ on Zee TV and know the only thing constant in the show is Annu Kapoor.
23) Many evenings have been spent watching little kids gyrate vulgarly on Boogie Woogie on Sony.
24) You were the coolest thing in class if you had a computer in your house while it was still the 90s.
25) You learnt LOGO and BASIC in school!
26) You couldn’t wait to start 4th standard so you could start writing with PENS instead of with pencils!
27) You often used terms and phrases like ‘two-say’, ‘same to you, back to you, with no returns’, and ‘shame shame, puppy shame, all the donkeys know your name.’
28) You most probably saw Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge at the cinema at least once. You also fantasized about singing songs in mustard fields as in the movie.
29) You have seen David Dhawan and Govinda movies and laughed at them.
31) You have said ‘haw’ or ‘yuck’ when you saw people kissing in English movies. (nowadays kids are used to it!)
30) Titanic was your FIRST favourite english movie.
31) You thought seeing English movies and speaking English made you the coolest thing ever.
32) You remember the Gujarat earthquake very clearly and could possibly tell everyone EXACTLY what you were doing when the earthquake occurred (yes, this happened in 2001, January 26, 2001, to be exact — but this group is about the things that Indian kids that GREW UP in the 90s remember and identify with).
33) Barbies for girls, and GI Joes for boys were the ultimate status symbols. You just wanted more more more and more. And how can I forget Hot Wheels, for both boys and girls?
34) You thought ‘imported’ clothes were definitely way better than ‘made in India’ clothes (never mind that a lot of clothes brought from overseas by NRI relatives were actually made in India, before ‘Made in China’ started appearing on EVERY existing thing)
35) "Jungle Jungle Baat Chali Hai Pata Chala Hai! Chaddi Pehen Ke Phool Khila Hai Phool Khila Hai!" You watched "The Jungle Book" every Sunday morning at 9.a.m" and just loved mowgli, bhalu and bagheera. A few years later, you watched Disney Hour, which had cartoons like Aladdin, Gummy Bears, Tail Spin, Uncle Scrooge!
36) At some point or other, cool was your favourite, and therefore, most overused word.
37) Captain Planet was your first introduction to environmental consciousness.
38) You have tried to convince people around you to not burst crackers on Diwali, and then gone straight back home and burst them yourself.
39) You have had endless packets of Parle Gluco G biscuits, and of Brittania Little Hearts biscuits.
40) You loved licking off the cream from the centre of Bourbon biscuits.
41) There were no Nike, Reebok, Adidas, Puma- Bata and Liberty was the way to go for your sports shoes.
42) You have probably consumed more Frooti in your lifetime than there is oil in Iraq.
43) You watched Baywatch on Star World when nobody was home even though (or because) your parents said you shouldn’t watch it.
44) You bought packets of potato chips for the specific purpose of collecting Tazos. And you had Tazos depicting everyone from Confucius to Daffy Duck to Daffy Duck dressed as Confucius.
45) For the longest time, the Maruti 800, the Premier Padmini, THE Fiat, and THE Ambassador were the only cars you saw on the road, and the Contessa was cool because it was bigger.
46) You would literally jump up in excitement if you ever chanced upon an imported car (Oh my gosh, is that really a MERCEDES?)!
47) You spent a good part of 1998 drooling over the Hyundai Santro and the Daewoo Matiz , debating which one was better.
48) You used to Fuzen gum. You also chewed Big (big) Babool and/or Boom Boom Boomer chewing gum. They were bright pink and disgusting tasting, but you loved them for the temporary tattoos.
49) Talking of temporary tattoos, you sometimes had contests with your classmates about who had more tattoos on their arm, leg, knee, hand, forehead, wherever.
50) You thought Mario and Contra were the coolest things ever invented, especially if you were a boy.
51) You knew that having the latest Hero or Atlas bicycle would make you the coolest kid on the block.
52) You can imitate Sushmita Sen’s winning gasp to perfection.
53) You have, at some point of time, worn GAP clothes (real or fake) like SRK in KKHH.
54) Seemingly senseless acronyms like SRK, DDLJ, DTPH, KKHH actually make sense to you..
55) You have at some point debated who was more beautiful- Aishwarya or Sushmita.
56) Baskin Robbins ice-cream was THE thing to have!
57) You know what Campa Cola is. And you also knew that Coca Cola was THE drink.
58) You would watch WWF keenly every evening/afternoon and loved Bret Hart "Hitman"! really thought Undertaker had seven lives and he made an “actual” appearance in the Akshay Kumar- starrer Khiladiyon ka Khiladi.
59) When all backpacks (or ’schoolbags’) and water bottles and tiffin boxes had strange cartoon characters that were hybrid versions of seven or eight different characters, and you still bought them, because a green man wih a water pistol, boots, a jet-pack, Johnny bravo hair, a rajasthani mustache, gloves, and underwear (long johns) over his pants, called ‘Mr. X’ was OBVIOUSLY a status symbol.
60) You remember the Nirma tikia jingle.
61) You remember the Nirma girl.
62) You remember the ‘doodh doodh piyo glass full doodh’ ad and also the ‘laal kaala peela, gulabi hara neela classic hai badia bristles wala’ and 'roz khao ande' ads.
63) You grew up reading, if you read at all, some or all of Nancy Drews, Enid Blyton books, Hardy Boys, Babysitters Club, Animorphs, Goosebumps, Sweet Valley series, Judy Blumes, and Tintin, or Archie comics. Because naturally, reading foreign authors made you much cooler than reading Tinkle.
64) Towards the late 90s (1998-99) at least some of us started our Harry Potter obsessions!
65) You absolutely HAD to go to Essel World if you were with cousins! “Essel World mein rahoonga main, ghar nahin nahin jaaonga main!”
66) You watched the Bournvita Quiz contest on TV pretty religiously. The smarter ones amongst you actually took part in it and had your entire school and your entire extended families watch you on it!
67) Maggi 2 Minute Noodles = ultimate snack (and tiffin, lunch, dinner)!
68) If you grew up in the early 90s, you recall the nation’s obsession with Mahabharata on TV
69) In the later 90s, you religiously followed Hip Hip Hooray on Zee. Maybe Just Mohabbat on Sony too
70) You remember parzan dastur sayin "JALEBI!!!!" in the Dhara Ad
71) You eagerly awaited Friendship Day, so you could give friendship bands to all your friends, and get bands from them in return. Then, of course, those with the most bands loved to show them off.
72) Backstreet Boys' "Quit Playing Games" was one of the first english songs that you LOVED!
73) Andaz Apna Apna is and most probably will always be your favourite comedy flick!! "Aila Jhakaas!!!"
74) This list made you smile.